A Way of Letting Go
Jax hated taking the train to anywhere especially in the city, it had always smelt of pungent odors like urine and as if someone hadn't showered in a month or so. It was so bad it would attach in the nostrils for hours after getting off. He didn't know where they derived from, he just knew there was an old bookstore downtown that he had to reach for new paper back treasures.
After twenty minutes and ten stops he stepped off taking in a deep, much needed breath of fresh air.
Walking the remainder of the few blocks he became more excited to rummage through the stacks of books he imagined would be there.
As he came upon the red brick building erected on the corner, he could tell this place was going to hold something amazing. The red letters that had been painted on were peeling and chipping away from the wear of years of harsh weather.
Peeking through the windows there stood stacks of books, piled so high they looked like paperback leaning towers of Pisa.
Pushing the old glass door open, the brass bell rang above as it clanked against the top. A welcoming waft of old grubby, stagnant paper slapped Jax in the face. He was in his comfort zone now.
Having spent his youth beaten, bullied and alone books had always been there for him. He was always searching for the next fantasy, horror or documentary to lose himself in and hide from the world he felt hated him.
As he looked around, he could tell that many of the books had gone untouched in years, layers of dust and dinge settled upon the top of each beautifully thick copy there.
Weaving his way through the narrow pathway he headed towards the back of the store. There stood an old broken shelving unit, that collapsed under the pressure of what was placed. It looked as though it was ready to decay like a tree stump in the forest that was rotting.
This is the place Jax thought. This is where I will find the most untouched and treasured of all the ones here.
Carefully removing and wiping each one he reads the titles, Survive, No-one is Ever Alone, We Are Not Our Circumstances.
Right then knew this was where he was meant to be. That this place was his therapy. He would find peace, gratitude and solace in this place with a way to let go of all that wronged him over the years. All the memories that flooded his mind he would process now. Here he would really let go, move on and be happy in life.
Reading through as much as he could without stopping for even a moment, the time had passed and the light through the front dirty window faded.
It was night and time to go, as he stepped outside things seemed different. There was new smells, new feelings and new thoughts. He had felt better than he had in years.
He was a whole new person thanks to the books he found in the back of the old bookstore and he was ready to take on the world .
#Calgary writer Jessica Nielsen is a poet, writer and author recently featured on the NUHA Foundation's blogging site with her piece titled "Never the Same Again". A professionally trained Healthcare Aide and mother of seven children she creates her works from experiences and the world around her. Always excelling with the love of writing; she perceives the world in simplistic and unique ways. She believes every person has something inspiring to share.